Posts Tagged With: NaNoPoblano

Day 1042: Happiness

Posted on November 8, 2015 by Ann Koplow

In yesterday’s blog post — which I was happy to present to you — we found out that thesaurus.com believes that happiness is the opposite of intensity.

Fairness, clarity, completeness, and closure are elements of happiness for me, so let’s see if thesaurus.com thinks “intensity” is an antonym of happiness.

It does not. Instead, it lists these:

depression, despair, discouragement, displeasure, dissatisfaction, gloom, melancholy, misery, pain, sadness, trouble, unhappiness, upset, woe, worry

Does what thesaurus.com does — or does not do — get in the way of my happiness today?

It does not.

What might get in the way of my happiness today?

When I was leaving the parking garage of the movie theater where Michael, Aaron, and I saw Bridge of Spies last night, I scraped some happy yellow paint off the side mirror of my car, which has been providing me with lots of happiness.
That’s all I can think of, in the moment.

To me, that is happiness — waking up in the morning thinking of only one minor, fixable barrier to happiness.

I’m sure if I spent more time, right now, thinking about past experiences of or future possibilities for

depression, despair, discouragement, displeasure, dissatisfaction, gloom, melancholy, misery, pain, sadness, trouble, unhappiness, upset, woe, worry

… I could come up with lots more.

Instead, I’m going to share the music I was singing out loud yesterday and images I captured, with happiness.

In my previous blog post quoting Pharrell William’s “Happy,” I wondered what he meant by a “room without a roof.”

Now I know.

What might contribute to your happiness today?

As always, it gives me happiness to express my thanks to all who help me create my posts and to all who read them (including you!).

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: "Happy" by Pharrell Williams, accepting all feelings, accepting happiness, antonyms of happiness, autumn in Boston, letting go of disappointment, letting go of perfectionism, living in the moment, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano | 23 Comments

Day 1041: Intensity

Posted on November 7, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday, as I was driving my intensely yellow car through the intensity of Boston traffic, I saw this:

In the intensity of the moment, I realized that Intensity Spray Foam contained the intensity I’d like for my next blog post.

Here are are my thoughts, right now, about “intensity”:

People often come into therapy because of the intensity of their feelings.
Intensity can be uncomfortable and enjoyable, too.
Personally, I prefer intensity to its opposite.
To me, the opposite of intensity is numbness or dullness.
The intensity of thesaurus.com includes this definition of intensity: passion, force.
Thesaurus.com also lists these synonyms of intensity (without the intensity of alphabetical order):

anxiety, concentration, depth, earnestness, emotion, energy, excitement, ferocity, fervor, fury, magnitude, power, severity, strength, vigor, acuteness, ardor, deepness, emphasis, excess, extreme, extremity, fanaticism, ferociousness, fervency, fierceness, fire, force, forcefulness, keeness, might, nervousness, potency, sharpness, strain, tenseness, vehemence, violence, volume, wildness, high pitch, intenseness

27 out of 42 of those intensity synonyms seem intensely positive to me. The intensity of my math skills tells me that “intensity” is therefore 64% personally positive.
I am intensely curious why “passion” is not listed as a synonym of intensity. Including “passion” bumps up the intensity of my personally positive percentage to 67%.
Ready for the intensity of intensity antonyms, according to thesaurus.com?

apathy, calm, calmness, ease, enervation, happiness, idleness, inactivity, lethargy, unimportance, weakness, powerlessness, dullness, laziness, moderation

7 out of those 15 words seem intensely negative to me, so the intensity negative percentage, for me, is 47%.
“Numbness” is not listed as an antonym. Including that increases the intensity of my personally negative percentage to 53%.

What are your mathematical and/or non-mathematical reactions to “intensity,” right now?

I can’t hold back the intensity of this thought:

Who — besides somebody at thesaurus.com — thinks that the opposite of intensity is happiness?

Here’s the intensity of my first, tentative answer to the intensity of my own question: Buddhists, perhaps?

Which of these photos — which I took in the intensity of much warmer than average temperatures yesterday — contain the most intensity, for you?

I hope you enjoy the intensity of this tune, which I heard while I was pondering intensity, yesterday:

I like the intensity of Kurt Elling‘s voice interpreting the intensity of “Minuano,” by Pat Metheny (whose music I’ve adored, with intensity, since the 1970s).

It just occurred to me, with intensity, that I don’t know what “Minuano” means. Maybe that definition is related to “intensity.”

A cold southwesterly wind of southern Brazil, occurring during the Southern Hemisphere winter.

Oooh. Intense.

I hope you can imagine the intensity of my gratitude for all who helped me intensely create this post and for you — of course! — for experiencing its intensity, today.

Categories: definition, personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: accepting all feelings, antonyms for intensity, being in the moment, intense feelings, Minuano, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, synonyms for intensity | 41 Comments

Day 1040: Too good to be true

Posted on November 6, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Have you ever thought that something was too good to be true? Was it too good? And was it true?

Why do we think that something can be too good to be true? Don’t we truly deserve good things to happen to us, as often as possible?

Here’s something true. I’ve never, ever had this thought:

That’s too bad to be true.

Why is that true, good people?

If something seems too good to be true, people often have distorted thoughts about it, including:

I don’t deserve this.
This is going to be taken away.
I better not talk about this.
Something terrible is going to happen.

Is that true for you, good readers?

Yesterday, I remarked that I was having a day that was too good to be true, because:

I found out that a good and true therapist is going to be hired by the hospital to work with me.
I saw reviews for my presentation at the hospital from a week ago that were so good that I wondered if they were true.
The temperature was a too-good-to-be-true-for-Boston-in-November 74 degrees.
My Thursday evening therapy group made me write “Ann is the best ever” on the white board. I wouldn’t believe that was true unless I had this good proof:

It’s true that a good member of the group last night also brought up AFOG (which stands for “Another Fucking Opportunity for Growth”). It’s too good to be true that I started this daily blog almost three years ago to help me write a book titled “AFOG.” If you don’t think that’s true, please read my good enough “About” page.

Have I truly written a book with the good title “AFOG”? No, because blogging every day since January 1, 2013 has been too good to be true for me.

Let’s see if I have any other photos from yesterday that are too good to be true.

I wonder if I can find some too-good-to-be-true music for this post.

It’s true that a good and superstitious person told me, yesterday, that I should throw salt over my left shoulder because of my too-good-to-be-true day. Here‘s too-good-to-be-true Stevie Wonder:

It’s too good to be true that my last photo matches that music, so well.

True thanks to all the good people who helped me write this post and to you — of course! — for being so true, to me.

Categories: blogging, personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: accepting all feelings, accepting compliments, AFOG, cognitive behavioral therapy, cognitive distortions, letting go of superstition, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, Stevie Wonder's "Superstition" | 17 Comments

Day 1039: Obligations

Posted on November 5, 2015 by Ann Koplow

This month of November, I’ve committed to posting every day. This does not feel like an onerous obligation to me, since I’ve chosen to post once a day since January 1, 2013.

I’ve determined that daily posting is not an obligation to anybody else, but rather a personal commitment to growth and healing.

Obligations feel a lot different than choices, don’t they?

Yesterday, my therapy group decided to discuss the topic of “obligations.” Here’s something Olivia, the social work intern, shared with the group participants:

Since I told Olivia I was going to include her drawing in today’s blog, I’ve now fulfilled that obligation. I also choose to explain that Olivia did a great job, yesterday, describing how hidden and unclear obligations make it more challenging to be obliging.

It’s not my obligation to share with you what I shared with the group yesterday, but I am choosing to show you this:

What are your thoughts and feelings about obligations?

I wonder who will feel obligated to respond if I ask which of these photos best represents the word “obligations”?

I feel obligated to tell you that this photo best represents obligations, for me …

… because it says “WASH ME.”

This photo

… could also represent new and daunting obligations to me, since those are the keys to my office, in Newton, Massachusetts. From now on, for one year, I have an obligation to pay rent for that space. However, providing group therapy in any location feels more like a privilege, to me, than an obligation.

Do I have an obligation to my readers to include music in this post? Do you have an obligation to listen?

I hope you know you’re not obligated to listen to all of Antonio Vivaldi‘s Early Concertos for “Violincello Obligato.”

Obligatory AND sincere thanks to all who helped me create today’s post and special thanks to you — of course! — no matter what your obligations are, today.

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: accepting all feelings, Antonio Vivaldi's Early Concertos for Violencello Obligato, daily blogging, dealing with obligations, group therapy, letting go of fear, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, personal power | 32 Comments

Day 1038: Determined

Posted on November 4, 2015 by Ann Koplow

I am determined to tell you, immediately, why this post is titled “Determined.”

Now that I’m determined to examine that image — which I determined to take yesterday — I’ve determined that it does NOT say “TBD,” which stands for To Be Determined. Instead, it says “TBA.”

Are we determined to discover what “TBA” stands for?

I’m determined to stay focused on “determined” today.

I’m determined to tell you that since my esteemed colleague, Mary, determined to retire from the hospital where we both work, we’ve been determined to find a wonderful therapist to fill her place. We’ve determined that nobody can really replace Mary, but we’re determined to find somebody special. Even though we’ve been determined to interview many determined people over many determined weeks, that list of determined therapists still reads “TBA,” (which I’m determined, now, to announce means “To Be Announced”).

I’m determined to hope that we announce, very soon, that we’ve determined that a determined, creative, empathic, and lovely person has determined to join us.

I’ve determined that I have other determined thoughts about “determined”:

I’m determined to meet with somebody today about renting office space, so I can offer my therapy groups to people who have determined to not have their determined doctors at that Boston hospital where I work.
I’m determined to help myself and others focus on self care, which studies have determined promotes longer and happier lives for those who are determined to do so.
Being determined doesn’t mean focusing on one thing to the exclusion of all others.
I am determined to have adult-to-adult interactions with people, so they can determine priorities and options in their lives.
It has yet to be determined what college my son is going to next year.
I’m determined to facilitate a therapy group of determined people, this morning, at the hospital where my new co-worker is yet to be determined and announced.
For the month of November, I’ve announced that I’m determined to post every day, along with other determined bloggers.
Here are more determined photos, from yesterday:

It’s TBD what I’m wearing to work today, but I’ve determined it won’t be what’s pictured above, since I determined to wear that yesterday.

Do you think this post is over determined?

It’s TBD and TBA what determined music I’m determining for this determined post.

Patience, please, while this is determined.

Some cheesy music by the determined and talented Tim Minchin has determined to stay in my head.

I’m determined to share it again, since I’ve determined that most people weren’t determined enough to play it two days ago.

What thoughts, feelings, or music might you be determined to share, here and now?

Determined thanks to all who helped me create this determined post and to you — of course! — for being determined enough to read it.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: "Cheese", daily blogging, determination, living in the moment, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, self-care, TBA, TBD, Tim Minchin | 28 Comments

Day 1037: Candied

Posted on November 3, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Dear sweet readers,

Can you guess why today’s post may be Candied?

Many of us, this time of year, buy too much candy for Halloween, and get candied ourselves.

Candied, indeed.

Yesterday, many sweet people in therapy talked about eating candy (among other things) and how that made them feel.

All that sugar activated my sweet tooth, so I tried getting candied …

… and got cookied, instead.

As I suggested to others throughout the day …

… mindful eating includes recognizing slips and self-forgiveness. Our self-worth is NOT dependent on what we eat or how we look.

By mindfully letting go of the extra sugar I’ve been eating lately, I was able to notice and appreciate other sweet things around me.

Now it’s time to share some sweet music in this candied post.

Candidly, I chose today’s title partly because of this:

The Candide Overture by Leonard Bernstein is here on YouTube, with over one million sweet views.

What are your candied thoughts and feelings, now?

Sweet gratitude to all who helped me create this candied post and special thanks to you — of course! — for bringing your sweet self here, today.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: accepting all feelings, chocolate, Halloween candy, Leonard Bernstein's Candide, mindful eating, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, personal medicine, self forgiveness, sugar cravings | 34 Comments

Day 1036: Cheese

Posted on November 2, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday, I visited my sister, Ellen, who is allergic to cheese.

Some people think limericks are cheesy. I hope Ellen isn’t allergic to this:

My sister, allergic to cheese,

Knows that living near water brings ease.

At this stage in her life,

She and Linda, her wife,

Have a condo that’s certain to please,

Next to water that never will freeze.

My limerick for Ellen has an extra line, but I wanted to give it an extra slice of cheese, for love and luck.

Speaking of slices of cheese, Ellen had this on her salad at lunch yesterday:

While that looks like a slice of cheese, it’s not. Would it be cheesy to ask you to guess what that is?

Personally, guessing games make me smile like I’m saying “cheese.”

Last night, our local supermarket was giving out free samples of cheese.

While you might think it cheesy to wear a Halloween costume the day after Halloween, I smiled when I saw this princess ….

… who kept going back for more cheese.

As usual, I saw other cheesy items at the supermarket.

Ellen and I are both far from 29, so I didn’t buy that cheesy “cake mate” to celebrate. By the way, I don’t think it’s cheesy for anyone to attain their heart’s desire (like a place near the ocean) late in life.

After my boyfriend Michael and I completed our cheesy food shopping last night, he made us veggie burgers with cheese (not pictured).

Here are several more slices of cheese for today’s cheese-filled post:

Say “cheese,” please, because studies have shown that smiling increases ease.

Thanks to all who helped me write this cheesy post and an extra slice of thanks to you — of course! — for eating it up.

Categories: humor, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: allergic to cheese, limericks, living near the ocean, Monty Python cheese shop, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, songs about cheese | 51 Comments

Day 1035: Change

Posted on November 1, 2015 by Ann Koplow

While I’ve written posts with “change” in the title before (here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here), I’ve never created a post simply called “Change.”

Today, that’s going to change.

It’s appropriate that change is happening today, because:

while I was asleep last night, there was a time change,
I’m hoping for a major change at work,
I’m taking a break this weekend from my job, where I help people make positive change,
my son Aaron submitted his first college application yesterday, which may change his life,
in my own therapy, I’m working on change,
as my boyfriend Michael wrote to me over five years ago (before the day we made the change to meet in person), “Things just change, regardless. No static spot to stand on this planet, that’s for sure.”
yesterday I saw a terrific play about change with my beloved friend, Barbara,
my sister recently changed where she lives and I’ll be seeing her new home for the first time today,
to visit my sister, I’ll need change for a toll bridge, and
I have pictures about “change” to share, for a change.

Here are more quotes about change:

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.
– George Bernard Shaw

When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves.
– Victor Frankl

Change before you have to.
– Jack Welch

Never believe that a few caring people can’t change the world. For, indeed, that’s all who ever have.
– Margaret Mead

The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.
– Nathaniel Branden

Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.
– Keri Russell

Just when I think I have learned the way to live, life changes.
– Hugh Prather

Things don’t have to change the world to be important.
– Steve Jobs

I hope everyone that is reading this is having a really good day. And if you are not, just know that in every new minute that passes you have an opportunity to change that.
– Gillian Anderson

For a change, Michael and I were talking about Gillian Anderson and The X-Files last night. We couldn’t change each other’s mind about which X-Files episode was the creepiest.

It’s time to change the mood of this post with some music. Michael loves David Bowie and I love Stephen Stills, so here are changes from both of them:

Thanks to all who helped me create this post about change and to you — of course! — for the change you bring, today.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: "Choice" by Winnie Holzman, "See the Changes", acceptance, David Bowie's "Changes", dealing with change, fall foliage, NaBloPoMo, NaNoPoblano, positive change, quotes about change, time change | 36 Comments