In my therapy groups, people often talk about being assertive, including setting limits and saying “no” to things they don’t want to do.
Because I’ve had to be compliant with many medical treatments (including yucky medication and surgery) since I was very young, being assertive can sometimes feel unfamiliar and even dangerous. At the same time, there have been times when not being assertive has been dangerous — like when I informed doctors that I thought my pacemaker was failing and was told that I was just anxious and to forget about it (and my pacemaker was failing).
This week I’ve been being assertive with an anticoagulant nurse and also a music distribution service. I’m also being assertive with myself by telling myself it’s okay to be assertive.
My husband Michael has a bit he does about being assertive. He’ll tell me a story about a situation where he spoke up assertively and when I ask if he really said that, he replies, “No, what I really said was ‘here’s my ass.’”
Is anyone being assertive in my images for today?
.
Here’s what I find when I search for “being assertive” on YouTube:
.
What does being assertive mean to you?
Thanks to all who help me in being assertive, including YOU!
Being a Maryland Terp, I’ll assertively say I appreciate that turtle photo, Ann.
I am going to assert that I’m glad to know that.
It’s okay to be assertive! (But I don’t like to be.)
Thank you for the reflections and photos.
Thank you for your reflections, Maureen.
over the years, I’ve learned to say no when I don’t want to do something, without an apology or long explanation, and to be okay with that and for me that was a big step.
It’s a very important step, beth.
I have become assertive in refusing to phone bank for elections. I hate it and I’m awful at it and I always hope I’ll get an answering machine. I swear I’ve lost votes instead of gained them. Used to say okay, I’ll do it, but now I just say no. But when I first started refusing to do so, I did spend a little too much time feeling guilty but I’ve even managed to stop that part. I remain available for anything I can do and will do well.
That is very impressive, Barbara! Thanks for sharing.
Sometimes I’ve said “I’m the one in charge here” and then added “if that’s okay with you.” If I can get a laugh it helps but I’ll be assertive if I have to.
I love that, Chris.