Monthly Archives: June 2015

Day 891: Remnants

Posted on June 10, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday, this remnant — of my visit with Kelsi, another social worker at work — was left on my iPhone camera:


Because I took that photo quickly, that’s not a complete remnant. It says

There are still a few remnants of magic left in this world.

Remnants of that beautiful saying and dragonfly will soon be just a memory, because Kelsi is leaving the hospital where we both work. Before she leaves (during the final remnants of Spring), I hope we fulfill the remnants of a shared hope: Kelsi co-leading a “Coping and Healing” therapy group with me next week.

Both coping and healing are good remnants to leave with people, aren’t they?

For my readers who might like some remnants of my audition last night in Concord Massachusetts USA for the Stephen Sondheim musical “Follies,”  here they are:

  • I sang in front of a dozen people, without fainting!
  • I spoke in front of a dozen people, without fainting!
  • I’ll find out, on Friday, whether I’m one of the remnants of the auditions.
  • Here are some remnants of things I wrote down last night,  while I was awaiting my turn:

Cognitive distortions: letting go of comparing myself to other people here. Or, compare yourself to other people in the world who are scared right now.  “The glass is already broken” — I’ve already done my audition and it was GREAT. Show up, be gentle, and tell the truth. My goal is to try out and I am losing my investment in getting a part. This is part of the process of my letting go of fear. Reframe: other people’s beautiful voices are not “a problem” for me, but rather something I can enjoy. What does competitiveness do to joy?

If you have any remnants of confusion from any writing remnants from me, please leave a remnant of your visit with a comment, below.

Here are more visual remnants of my yesterday:
  
      

        
I’m going to take a break, now, to grab more remnants of sleep before I get up for the day.

. . . . . .

Remnants of sleep often elude me these days, perhaps because of:

  • Remnants from my recent, heart-related surgery,
  • Remnants of thoughts,
  • Remnants of feelings,
  • Remnants from the past,
  • Remnants of the new day’s sun, bursting through our bedroom windows (which have no remnants of black-out curtains).

Here are some remnants of today I may be blogging about tomorrow:

  1. My work, during the morning, as an individual and group therapist at a Boston teaching hospital.
  2. Taking care of remnants of uncompleted tasks, like writing a recommendation for a former student.
  3. Attending “Simply Sondheim” at the Boston Pops tonight, with my 17-year-old son Aaron and my ex-sister-in-law Deborah.
  4. Getting more and better remnants of sleep.

A remnant of my blogging requirements for today is choosing a song about “Remnants.”

Here’s a song called “Remnants” by My Morning Jacket:

Here are two remnants of my search for “memories” on YouTube:

#1 “Memories” from The Temptations.

#2 “Future Memories” by ATB.

Large remnants of gratitude to Kelsi, dragonflies, magic, those who cope and heal in groups (and elsewhere), all the kind people at my audition last night, Stephen Sondheim, my son Aaron, my ex-sister-in-law Deborah, My Morning Jacket,  the Temptations, André Tanneberger (ATB), and  you — of course! — for any remnants you bring and/or leave behind, here and now.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , | 55 Comments

Day 890: Please list ALL conflicts you have

Posted on June 9, 2015 by Ann Koplow

If somebody asked you to please list all conflicts you have, how long a list would that be?

If I were to honestly list all my conflicts, those might include conflicts

  • with people,
  • of time,
  • within myself,
  • past conflicts,
  • current conflicts, and
  • other types of conflicts, which I’m too conflicted and tired to identify, in the moment.

Two days ago — during the finale of a 3-day group psychotherapy conference  — a very talented group therapist from Texas, Jeffrey Hudson, asked us all some excellent questions about family-of-origin conflicts and emotions, including:

In case there are any conflicts about reading those questions clearly, here they are:

Who did you hate the most when growing up? What did you do with your hatred?

Many people at the conference expressed conflicts in reaction to those questions about hate — an emotion we’re so conflicted about.  Personally, I found all of Jeffrey Hudson’s questions helpful. I plan to use them at work, to help people list important conflicts.

There might be a conflict in this post, right now. You might have the conflicted and erroneous  belief that Jeffrey Hudson is the person who inspired today’s post about listing all conflicts. And while Jeffrey’s questions might inspire somebody to list  important  conflicts, here’s what actually triggered this post:


That’s the audition form I filled out yesterday for the Concord Players, which asked that I please list all conflicts I might have with the rehearsal schedule for the musical “Follies,” starting in September.

Knowing me the way you do, would you assume I would have many conflicts to list?

Actually, because of the therapy groups I do on Thursday nights …


… I may have too many conflicts to be cast in the play.

I’m still going to the “Follies” audition tonight, though, because I am completely non-conflicted in my wish to overcome all conflicting fears about singing a difficult song in public.

Please list all conflicts you have about these conflicting photos, which I took yesterday:


                   

 IMG_9992        

I am now pleased to list all my conflicts with the word “verb”:

  1. “Verb” is not a verb, but rather a noun.

Please list all your conflicts  with this post in a comment below. I will have no conflicts about responding to all your comments before the end of the day, no matter how many conflicts I encounter.

I shall now list all my conflicts about choosing a song for today:

  1. I can’t think of any song about listing all conflicts.
  2. I don’t want any other song to conflict with my audition song for tonight.

Therefore, here‘s another version of the song I’ll be singing at that audition (letting go of all conflicts):

That’s the rendition of Stephen Sondheim‘s “Green Finch and Linnet Bird” on YouTube that has the least conflict with my natural singing style.

Unconflicted thanks to Kresley Figueroa (for her beautiful singing on a conflicted song), to Jeffrey Hudson (who trained to become a classical pianist before becoming a psychotherapist), to the Concord Players, to all the conflicted creatures and things that helped me create this conflicted post, and to you — of course! — for overcoming all conflicts to be here, now.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , | 38 Comments

Day 889: This is Real

Posted on June 8, 2015 by Ann Koplow

This is real. I saw this real sign yesterday at Simmons College in Boston, during a group therapy conference titled “Getting Real: Vulnerability and Effective Group Leadership.”

During the real group therapy conference, these were real:

  • My first real workshop for fellow real group therapists — about the real groups I really do four times a week —  went real, real well.
  • I really confronted somebody about a really critical comment made to me years ago that really made my self confidence reel — and that encounter went real, real well.
  • Real people, all during the group therapy conference, were real — really showing and acknowledging all the real human feelings, including sadness, anger, shame, fear, and joy.

These were also real, yesterday:

    

                  

This is real: I don’t care what that Sweet Scoops  carton really says. Winter is NOT really the real season now, in Boston.

This is real: As I’m really writing this real post, I’m wearing a kind-of-blue, real hair extension.


Is this real hair extension real blue, kind of blue, or real teal? And what is the real reason I’ve felt like wearing really brightly colored real hair extensions, really recently? And will I  feel real and/or nervous tomorrow night at an audition when I ask the real musical question “Green finch and linnet bird, nightingale, blackbird, why is it you sing?”

I really learned this at the Getting Real group therapy conference:  it’s really helpful to ask real questions and give real answers about real feelings, even if those feelings are uncomfortable or kind of blue.

This is a real musical segue: Kind of Blue by the real Miles Davis (and featuring the real  John Coltrane, the real Bill Evans, and other real jazz giants) has really been my favorite album for over 45 real years.

This is a real 50th anniversary tribute to that real masterpiece, with real feelings:

Do you have any real feelings or real questions about anything in this post? This is real: I welcome all of them.

Real thanks to Simmons College, to all attending the Northeastern Society of Group Psychotherapy annual conference, to people open to repairing past experiences, to those who sing on steps or elsewhere, to Harriet Beecher Ashworth  (for her sewing), to super markets and super hair extensions, to Stephen Sondheim (for asking the real musical question about caged birds singing), to Miles Davis, to John Coltrane, to Bill Evans, to Paul Chambers, to Cannonball Adderley,  to Jimmy Cobb, and to you — of course! — for making this real, today.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

Day 888: Counting

Posted on June 7, 2015 by Ann Koplow

I count on my readers to count some important numbers in my posts, as I count my way from Day 1 to Day … ?

Ready to count some numbers today?

888 is the number of consecutive days I’ve posted.

16 is the number my group therapy workshop hosted.

92 is the number of words in  “educational objectives” for that meeting.


1 is for the wonderful sustaining bar a kind friend gave me, for eating.

2 is the number of photos I took at my office, nearby.


1 is the number of pictures I took, without knowing why.

2 is the number of ears on this bunny:


4 is the number of photos I snapped that seemed funny.


  

100%  was the positive feedback I got yesterday.

9 is the number of hours I’ll spend at the conference today.

2 is the number of days before my musical  audition.

2 is the number of Muppets in this counting rendition:

Countless is the number of thanks I’m now giving
For blogging, my readers, my work, and for living.

Categories: blogging, gratitude, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , | 52 Comments

Day 887: G is for Groups

Posted on June 6, 2015 by Ann Koplow

G is for groups, which I believe are quite healing,

P is for photos I hope are appealing,


                      

E is for Excellence — for which I am striving,

W is for workshop, 12 people arriving,


K is for Karen, the coolest of neighbors,


L is for Love and is also for Labors,

N is for Now and I’m ready to say,

Gee, my group workshop is happening today.

Here are more letters, appearing in song:

I love the idea of you singing along!

Thanks to you all as I go and prepare
For a workshop I dare to declare more than fair.*

* A is for Ann — Announcing Aspirations for Awesome!

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , | 40 Comments

Day 886: Positive and Negative

Posted on June 5, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday, like any other day, contained the positive and the negative.

First, I went to a conference on medical care innovation,  at a Boston hotel, where people talked about both. Then, I went to the hospital where I work, to facilitate a therapy group.

Here are some of the positive and negative topics we discussed at that evening therapy  group:

As you can see, we talked a lot about the balance of positive and negative. We discussed yin  and yang and how you can’t have one without the other. Here’s something positive and negative I drew, about that:

Here are some more negative and positive photos I took yesterday, during my positive and negative day:


                                            

                   

Do some of those images seem more positive or negative to you?

When I got home last night, our negative and positive  cats — Harley and Oscar — further demonstrated this concept of positive and negative. Oscar is surprisingly positive about the vacuum cleaner …


… and Harley is negative about it.

My 17-year-old son, Aaron, is neither negative nor positive about the vacuum cleaner, but he is positive he loves the negative and positive singer/songwriter Tom Waits. I’m positive about that,  because Aaron came home last night from a positive banquet celebrating his successful one-act play, dressed as Tom Waits:
  

I’m positive that’s a fake cigarette Aaron is holding. He would never do anything negative, like smoking.

I’m also positive that I want to post two videos of Tom Waits singing his negative/positive song — “God’s Away on Business” — for this positive/negative post.

Which version do you think is more positive or negative — the live one with Tom Waits and the Kronos Quartet or the one which a positive genius created with clips of the Cookie Monster?

Please leave any positive and/or negative thoughts you choose in a comment; I promise I will have only positive things to say, in return.

Positive/negative gratitude to everybody I encountered yesterday, including those attending the innovation in primary care conference, people in last night’s therapy group, my friend Jan (who was holding the colorful cell phone), my boyfriend Michael (who was holding the vacuum cleaner), Oscar, Harley, Aaron, and Tom Waits. And special thanks to you, for making this post part of your positive/negative day.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , | 40 Comments

Day 885: Believe that you’re going to be okay

Posted on June 4, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday, during a therapy session. I wrote this on my office whiteboard:

I wrote that for somebody who’s been having  some very painful and stubbornly unshakable worries about the future. Recognizing that as a helpful antidote for the cognitive distortion of catastrophizing, she took a picture of it, so she could look at it whenever the negative, frightening thinking came back.

As you can see, I took a picture of it also, to help with my own automatic, fortune-telling thoughts.

I think that picture  has been working, because I do believe that I’m going to be okay … today, tomorrow, and the next day.

Do you believe that, now, for yourself?

Here are some other things I believe that helped me (and perhaps others) to be okay, yesterday:


                   

Okay! I do love adventure, but I don’t think I should howl at this particular moment.  I believe that howling is okay, but it’s extremely early in the morning, right now.

Believe that I’m going to be okay today at a conference on medical practice innovation in Boston (and afterwards, at one of my therapy groups at work).

Before I leave, is it okay if I share some “Believe that you’re going to be okay” music?

I believe that you’re going to be okay with one of these “Believe” songs.

“Believe”‘by Mumford & Sons:

“I’m a Believer,” performed by the Monkees:

“Reason to Believe” by Bruce Springsteen:

I believe this is the last song it’s okay to post: “I Believe in You” from the musical How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying starring Robert Morse (who I believe that you’re going to know  from “Mad Men”):

Believe that I’m going to be okay if you suggest another song (or express anything you believe is going to be okay, in a comment).

Believable thanks to everybody who helped me create this okay post and to you — of course! — for believing enough to visit here, today.

Categories: inspiration, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , | 50 Comments

Day 884: Busy

Posted on June 3, 2015 by Ann Koplow

I may have been too busy lately to share this with you, but the next 7 days are going to be very, very busy for me.

Let’s get busy with a list of my busy-ness, shall we?

  • Today will be a typically busy Wednesday for me, with  individual therapy and group therapy at work in the morning, an appointment in the afternoon, and then errands  and hanging with my boyfriend Michael in the evening.
  • Tomorrow I will be busy attending an all-day conference on medical practice innovation starting at 7:30 AM, busily rushing back to work in time for my therapy group at 5:30 PM.
  • Friday I’ll be busy at the very full and busy first day of  the annual conference of the Northeastern Society for Group Psychotherapy (NSGP), a professional organization I’ve been busy with for over 20 busy years.
  • Saturday I’ll be busily attending a morning workshop given by my friend and colleague Maxine, attending a business meeting of the busy board of directors of NSGP, presenting a workshop on my busy therapy groups in the afternoon, and going to a busy NSGP dinner at a busy Boston restaurant,
  • Sunday is almost as busy — with the final day of the NSGP conference —  although I probably won’t be busy with anxiety, because my presentation will be over.
  • Monday I get back to my busy job an hour earlier than usual, because I’ve had to schedule patients I was too busy to see on Thursday and Friday.
  • Tuesday I need to busily drive out to Concord, Massachusetts USA  (the site of some busy revolutionary  activity in the 1700s) to sing a very busy and difficult song as I audition for a local production of the musical Follies, created by the very busy and talented Stephen Sondheim.
  • Something I was too busy to remember when I published this post, a busy hour ago: on Wednesday evening I’m going to the Boston Pops with my son Aaron and my ex-sister-in-law Deborah, for an all Sondheim evening of music.

Wow. I’m going to be busy. Also, busy cold germs started getting busy in my nose and throat, yesterday.

Speaking of yesterday,  I was busy yesterday afternoon saying goodbye to Laura, who I’ve been busily and happily supervising at work. Laura will be busy, from now on, getting supervision elsewhere. I’m too busy to tell you more details about that, but I’m not too busy to tell you I will miss seeing Laura, every Tuesday at 4 PM.

I hope Laura isn’t too busy to read this blog post. She often isn’t, so …

“Hi, Laura!”

I hope I haven’t lost you in all the busy-ness of today’s post. Here are some busy pictures I wasn’t too busy to take yesterday:


IMG_9781

            

   

I’ve been busy thinking about some busy music to busily include in today’s busy blog.

That’s the first 10 minutes of a busy production of Stephen Sondheim’s Company, which starts out with many busy noises of downtown NYC and includes many busily wonderful performances. Now I’m busily remembering how — in the 1970s — I was busy attending rehearsals for a local production of Company in Lexington, Massachusetts USA (another site of some busy revolutionary  activity in the 1700s).

I know we’re all busy these days, but if you leave a busy comment below, I’m not too busy to answer it.

Busy thanks to all the busy people mentioned in this post and to you — of course! — for being not too busy to visit, here and now.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , | 44 Comments

Day 883: Be Kind

Posted on June 2, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Yesterday I saw this sign, at work:

Okay, folks, we’ve got a great blog post for you all here today. I can already tell that you’re gonna love it.

I’d like to be kind, right now, and explain how that last paragraph kind of quotes the introduction my 17-year-old son Aaron speaks  in the one-act play “Serious Economics.”

If you know nothing of “Serious Economics” — which Aaron wrote and directed and kind of starred in with his kind and good friend Cameron —  please be kind enough to read my blog posts from two and three days ago.

Now I shall be kind enough to show you the other kinds of photos I took, yesterday, from the office of social worker Erin, who seems to be kind to everyone:



     

Erin and I both know that being kind to others is very important, but being kind to yourself is just as important. Therefore, I shall now be kind to myself and do what makes my heart sing:

Be kind enough to take a look at “Serious Economics,” taped by a high school senior Aaron barely knows, who was being very, very kind last weekend.

I shall kind of conclude today’s kind post with one more “be kind” story.

Two days ago, Aaron sent the video of “Serious Economics” to N. Gregory Mankiw, the real Harvard economist featured in his play. Was N. Gregory Mankiw being kind when he quickly emailed Aaron back the following?

Thanks. But how did you know I keep a large nuclear warhead under my dining room table?

If you have thoughts about that or anything else I kind of presented in this post, please be kind enough to leave a comment below.

Kind thanks to all the kind folks who made this kind of post possible, including Erin, Aaron, Cameron, Luke (who was kind  enough to put “Serious Economics” on his smart phone Saturday night), and  N. Gregory Mankiw. And kind thanks to you — of course! — for being kind enough to visit, today.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, pride | Tags: , , , , , , | 38 Comments

Day 882: Brains

Posted on June 1, 2015 by Ann Koplow

Last night, before my  boyfriend Michael and I left for our weekly food-shopping, I overheard him using his brain to say to Harley …

What is it, my precious pea-brain?

… which got my brain going, like so:

  • Are cats’ brains the size of peas, as Michael has been mentioning since the day I met him?
  • If cats’ brains are the size of peas, does that mean that all the intelligence and soul I see in them is a figment of my own brain?
  • If cats’ brains are the size of peas, what kind of peas are we talking about?


          

  • If cats’ brains are the size of peas, what vegetable are dogs’ brains the size of?

  • If cats’ brains are the size of peas, what  vegetable are human brains the size of?

Regarding that last question, I’m thinking maybe cauliflower, but I wasn’t brainy enough to get a picture of that last night.

  • If human brains are the size of a large vegetable (not pictured), how do they create and comprehend all the things my brain encountered at the supermarket?

  

             

     
            

                      

How would you use your human brain to guess what that last item is?

Speaking of human brains, here’s Al, whom we see on Sundays at the supermarket:

Al is always brainy enough to open every carton of eggs, to make sure they’re okay. Last night, I used my brain to ask Al how he uses his brain when he inspects those eggs. Then, Michael and Al used their brains, as follows:

Michael: Here’s how I make sure the eggs here are good, Al.  I lick them.
Al:  You want to know the best way to test eggs? Bounce them off the floor.

At this point, how do you use your brain to comprehend  Michael’s, Al’s and/or my brains? What about your own brain?

Now I need to use my brain, one more time,  to choose a song for today’s brainy post.

Using my brain to look back at this post, I could


from YouTube:

… but my brain has noticed that videos from the brains of certain artists tend to go away, in these posts.

So how about this brainy song?

Now, I have to use my brain:

  • to interact with animals and humans,
  • for my work as a therapist at a Boston hospital, and
  • to prepare for my conference workshop this Saturday about the therapy groups I’ve created with my brain (and my heart).

Brainy thanks to Michael, Al, Harley the cat, Faxy the dog, The Wizard of Oz, peas and brains and hearts of all sizes, artisans and artists known as Prince, cauliflower (not pictured), and you  — of course! — for bringing your brain (and the rest of you) here, today.

Categories: fun, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , | 43 Comments

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