When I feel great, I fear that something bad will follow. Good things & bad things happen, but not necessarily in that order.
Last night, when I was feeling great about this week & next, that crown fell off. My dentist — who is wonderful & enjoying a much earned vacation in Florida — reassured me & texted another dentist at Beacon Hill Dental Associates. On Tuesday, I’ll take the cats to the vet & see that dentist.
Are you reading & commenting today?
Thanks & more thanks to all who helped me create today’s post & to you (including my wonderful dentist!) for reading, here & now.
One of my recurring dreams is to have a show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Much to my amazement, that will be occurring on August 19 at 13:00 (1 PM) at the Natural Food Kafe basement room. I only have one show this year, but I’m hoping the show will be recurring next year.
My show — “Group ‘Therapy’ with Ann” — is loosely based on the recurring groups that I do five times a week at work. At this point, I’m staying up and having dreams about how to make that work well since there are new and non-recurring elements I’ve never dealt with before, including:
it’s about half the time of my usual groups,
I don’t know how many people will show up,
several of the participants will be total strangers to me, and
it’s a show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival!
I know that I will be using some recurring elements of my real groups, like mindfulness and a check-in where everybody will have the space and time to speak uninterrupted. In my recurring groups, I always introduce the check-in by saying what I’m curious about in the moment, as a way to suggest what people might want to share. For the purposes of my Edinburgh show, I’m planning on curiously asking people:
why they came to the show,
how they would introduce themselves,
something we might not guess about them,
their experience in the moment,
what keeps them up at night,
what keeps them going,
a favorite saying and/or song, and
a recurring or vivid dream they’ve had.
In my check-in, I plan on singing one of my original songs and also sharing a recurring dream I have, about trying to call somebody on the phone and not getting through.
Last night, what kept me up was my indecision, at this point, about what to do at the mid-point of the show. When I finally fell asleep, I had my recurring dream (which hasn’t occurred in years).
In my dream last night, I was trying to call Michael on my cell phone. It was incredibly difficult, because of new changes to the phone, which I couldn’t figure out. People were trying to help me connect to him, but nothing was working. Eventually, I attempted the tried-and-true method of saying to Siri, “Call Michael!” At that moment, Michael showed up. I was very relieved to see him, but it was too late for me to get to an important appointment. (The dream had other non-recurring elements, including a Trump supporter who kept trying to steal one of my boots as I was putting it on, but never mind.)
Do you have a recurring dream? Would you talk about it if you came to my show? Actually, it would be a dream for me if any of my readers showed up at my Fringe show, no matter what they decided to share.
Certain recurring dreams and themes show up in my photos. Can you spot any today?
Here’s the original song I’m going to sing during my check-in, which has had recurring appearances in this blog:
I have a recurring dream about people leaving comments, and they often do!
Recurring thanks to all who help me create this daily recurring blog, including you!
Yesterday, after spending time with a wise girl in her 70s who just won’t quit and who recently received a new diagnosis of a chronic illness, I saw this:
The girl writing this blog will never quit
appreciating others,
observing,
stopping to smell the flowers,
healing,
hoping,
loving,
connecting,
renewing,
revealing,
looking for the beauty in every moment,
knowing that life is good,
putting herself out there,
believing in the power of groups, and
taking pictures.
Those last three photos show my boyfriend who won’t quit until he dismantles and gets rid of that hot tub.
Hi, my fringe show has been accepted. There are shows from the 20th to the 24th.
Since Aaron and I both applied many months ago to perform our own shows at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival (which starts in August), we’ve accepted the ever-growing possibility that neither of our shows would be accepted.
My son and I accepted the process of waiting to hear about our shows very differently — I kept holding out hope (until very recently) that we would both be accepted and Aaron very quickly accepted the stance of assuming that both of our shows would not go on.
I hope Aaron accepted both of my responses to his wonderful news:
Great!
What can we learn from this?
I hope you’ve accepted my intent there: to invite Aaron to hold on to hope in the future.
Personally, because I’ve accepted years of uncertainty dealing with medical issues from birth, it helps me to hold onto hope. I’ve accepted that other people deal with uncertainty very differently. (It’s accepted that I sometimes say this in my Coping and Healing groups: “Different strokes for different folks.”)
I’ve also accepted that I probably will not get a Fringe show, which was titled Group “Therapy” with Ann. However, if I do get accepted, I’m ready!
Aaron was accepted to teach English in Jordan this month, so when he gets back here on July 20th, we’ll make sure that YouTube accepts a longer version of that.
Also, I applied yesterday to join a panel in September for my 45th reunion at Harvard on “Picking up the Pieces: How Did You Embrace Life and Find Happiness Again?” In my application, I offered to talk about dealing with conflicting medical advice and finally getting a mechanical heart valve in 2016 (a process well documented and accepted on this blog). I wonder if my application will be accepted, especially since I offered to perform my original song “Shameless Appeals for Applause.”
Five years ago, I applied to be on a “Voices of Our Class” panel at my college reunion, and my application was not accepted. I’ve accepted that often you have to try, try again.
Soon after that, when we were in line for Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith, I received this email, in response to my attempt to aim higher by applying to do a show at the 2019 Edinburgh Fringe Festival:
Happy New Year 2019 Applicants
Thank you for applying to join The Free Fringe in 2019. This is just a short message to let you know the first allocations will be on their way in the next couple of weeks so please sit tight. We’ve all had a stupidly busy Christmas period as I hope you have, or at least a very happy one, and are working out the first pieces of the jigsaw puzzle.
If you’re one of those first pieces, it helps us and your fellow performers hugely if you let us know your intentions as soon as possible after receiving your offer. That said, please don’t accept unless you’re absolutely sure you will be taking the slot. Thanks 🙂
I often try to aim higher, thinking about this quote from one of my favorite poets:
I’m going to end this “Aim Higher” post by aiming for higher gratitude for all who helped me create it and for all who are reading it, here and now, and also by aiming to see you again tomorrow!
