Yesterday morning, when my 17-year-old son Aaron was leaving for school, it was so cold my iPhone was reporting 7 degrees, F.
It was so cold I was concerned about how cold Aaron would be during his short walk outside.
It was so cold, I encouraged him to wear gloves (which he didn’t).
It was so cold I shared some “It was so cold” jokes from the internet, trying to convince Aaron (who’s had his standup comedy routine down cold) to dress warm.
It was so cold …
- hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!
- pickpockets were sticking their hands in strangers’ pockets just to keep them warm!
- squirrels in the park were throwing themselves at an electric fence!
- I chipped a tooth on my soup!
- Grandpa’s teeth were chattering – in the glass!
- the dogs were wearing cats!
- the dogs had to put jumper cables on the rabbits – just to get them running!
- the politicians had their hands in their OWN pockets!
- the muggers were phoning in sick!
- we didn’t clean the house – we just defrosted it!
- when I needed local anesthesia, the dentist told me to stick my head outside!
- you needed defrosters just to have a good cry!
- a flasher rushed up to poor Mrs. Flannigan – and described himself!
- a comedian was rushed to the hospital after being pelted with frozen tomatoes!
Before I’m pelted with cold, frozen tomatoes by my readers, I’ll let you know that it was so cold that I skipped my usual walks and took only these cold photos:
As my cold car was reporting 11 degrees, the warm announcer on the local classical radio station was reporting 8 degree weather.
That chair looks like it’s been left out in the cold.
I took that last photo after a therapy group, where the cold participants chose the cool topic “No Man Is An Island.”
Any cold comments?
Warm thanks to my son Aaron; to collectors of cold jokes; to those who share the cold and the warmth in group therapy; to Laura Carlo, whose kind voice on WCRB classical radio warms listeners on even the coldest of mornings; to chairs and others who have been left out in the cold; and to you — of course! — for reading how cold it is, here and now.
http://www.animatedtalltales.com/webisodes/322-paul-bunyan-in-wicked-winter
Thanks for the warmth of that giantly cool link!
A great series of cold bullet points. Have you thought of equipping Aaron with gloves on the end of elastic threaded through his coat sleeves, like we had as children?
More cool synchronicity, Derrick. On my cold drive home last night, I was wishing I could attach my mittens to my coat sleeves in that very way. Aaron won’t wear gloves, no matter how they’re attached.
It was so cold….. “How cold was it”…Johnny Carson throwback.☺ Smiling at your list.
I was out yesterday, and I saw folks (guys) in shorts and light sweatshirts. I’ll never understand.
Some guys don’t mind being cold, I guess. Thanks for the cool comment, Van!
Looks like it was a good indoors day! Great post.
I feel warmed by this great comment, Miriam!
Have a hot tea!
I will!
Funny you mentioned that dental numbing technique, maybe I’ll try it someday!
Lovely post as always
Thanks for having such a warm dental practice in Boston, Dr. Del Castillo!
I bought my parents matching ‘pins’ with their initials on. My Dad thanked me for the Hot and Cold.
Hubby and I are a perfect match. If he’s cold in bed, I’m his hot water bottle.
It was so warming to read this comment.
As a kid I had a series of books about the McBroom family and their miraculous one-acre farm, source of many tall tales. It’s so cold the only one I can remember is about the winter it was so cold every time the family tried to speak to each other there was nothing but silence. When the weather warmed they started hearing their disembodied voices. Their words had frozen in midair and could only be heard when they thawed.
It’s said that laughter is the best medicine, and it’s a good way to warm up too.
Thanks for warming us all up with that memory, Chris.
Itś so cold here but your post warmed me up!
It’s warmer here now, too, Lisa!
When I was cold my grandmother used to rub my hands to warm them up and she would always say”cold hands, warm heart.” So thank you for a post about the cold that made me feel all warm and fuzzy!
This comment made me feel all warm and fuzzy, Jill!
Brrrrr…funny!
Brrrrrrr…I’m happy!
I don’t know what 7 degrees is exactly, but right now here it’s -12 degrees Celcius. And I had the same problem convincing my 17 year-old son to dress warmly. At least I got him to put a heavy winter coat in the back seat of his car “just in case”!
I just did the C to F conversion and it was colder here. We both have cold-proof sons!
Nice jokes! And I hear you — the day before yesterday was the first day of the season that it was REALLY cold — like, so cold it made your face and your fingers hurt — even through your gloves! Oy. 🙂
Oy and ouch! Thanks for the nice comment.
Such temperatures are why humans used to be migratory….
I live in California… for good reason.
“A British colonist and an Indian were walking in the woods during winter. The colonist wore long underwear, heavy mackinaw, overcoat, scarf, gloves, etc. The Indian strode along in the snow in just moccasins and a leather shirt & pants. The colonist asked, “Aren’t you cold?” His companion replied, “Is your face cold?” “Well, yes, but, I’m used to that.” “Me all face.” was the stoical reply….
One can grow accustomed to anything, when familiar enough….Knowledge is power.
😉
gigoid
I grow accustomed to your comments, gigoid. Many thanks.
I hope it warms up Ann, I don’t like knowing you’re cold!
It is warming up a little, Maria. Thank you for your warm concern!
Yes it was cold here yesterday as well, cold and wet but fine today
It’s fine today to see you, Joanne.
Hope these were just outside code but warm at your heart 🙂
It is warm at my heart, now.
This was good for me. I am up resentfully early because here we have wet, rather than cold, and when the rain is very heavy it drips down the bedroom chimney and pings on the iron baffle at the bottom… but we are not cold. Some parts of children never grow up… especially the parts about taking parental advice on small matters. It’s weird because in all other ways they become the most tractable of adults.
It’s always less cold for me, Hilary, when you leave your warmly helpful comments.
Love the jokes
Love that you love them!
I don’t feel left out in the cold now I’m here again 💛
I left this comment out in the cold before realizing it was here. It warms my heart to see you, Val.
Now I remember why I don’t want to live in Canada or Scotland ever again. Give me the temperate South Pacific (New Zealand) every time.
It is so cold in Boston and I am so sick of it I’m surprised I haven’t moved somewhere so temperate yet. Thanks for commenting from New Zealand, Judith!