I’m going to give you some wiggle room, now, to think about what “wiggle room” means to you.
Here’s a little photographic wiggle room, while you’re taking the room to think about that:
Those bunnies and chicks look like they’re wiggling in that room, don’t they?
It looks like there’s some wiggling going on there, too, even though that wiggling is taking place in a parking garage, not a room.
Let’s see if there are any other photos wiggling on my iPhone that might make more room for the concept of “wiggle room.”
Actually, that seems like the OPPOSITE of wiggle room; it’s a description of somebody not moving.
Okay, this post has wiggled around, long enough. Here’s a definition of wiggle room that’s currently wiggling on the web:
(Informal) the freedom or opportunity to do something, or to change your mind and do something differently, if that is what is needed.
Here’s my personal — and perhaps simpler — definition of “wiggle room”:
(Informal) the space and freedom to move, without negative consequences.
Now that we have some definitions of “wiggle room,” allow me the wiggle room to explain why I’m writing about “wiggle room” today.
Since I’ve been giving myself the wiggle room — through this blog, EMDR therapy, and other means — to wiggle further along the path to self discovery and personal growth, I’ve realized that “wiggle room” is a very important concept, for me.
Rather than wiggle through another long sentence trying to explain this, I’ll try a wiggly brief explanation:
Because of things that have happened to me in the past, I can easily believe that I have little or no wiggle room with other people.
In other words, I am constantly fighting fears that any tiny wiggle of a
- Mistake,
- Mis-step, or
- Misunderstanding
can threaten a relationship, no matter how secure that relationship actually is.
Here’s one wiggly example, illustrating this:
When I was in my early 20s, I managed to escape, physically unscathed, from an encounter with a rapist outside my apartment. When I went inside, shaking with relief and terror, I did not wake up my roommate, for fear she might be annoyed with me for doing so.
Can you see how wigglingly weird that is — my not realizing I had that wiggle room with my roommate, to disturb her sleep for such a good reason? Especially since my roommate was a dear and loving friend I’d known since childhood.
I could give you many different — if less dramatic — examples of how wigglingly easy it is for me to doubt that I have any wiggle room with others.
I believe that my habitual difficulty with wiggle room causes confusing wiggles in my relationships. That is why I have deliberately and consciously been creating the wiggle room, this year, to realize I have LOTS more wiggle room with other people.
Does this make any wiggly sense?
I wonder if I have the wiggle room, now, to share a few more photos that may — or may not — relate to “wiggle room.”
Let’s find out, shall we?
I hope you know that you have the room to wiggle about those photos — or anything else — however you choose.
I shall now take a little more wiggle room, for myself, to share this wiggly musical memory:
It’s the Wiggles, singing about “Fruit Salad” in their wiggly way.
Now I need to wiggle my way to work, to a teeth cleaning (with a wiggly IV of antibiotics), and to a high school reunion planning meeting. I expect there will be lots of wiggle room, everywhere.
Wiggly and roomy thanks to all those who helped me wiggle my way to writing today’s post and special thanks to you — of course! — for making room to read it.
Love that Platinum Rule! Wish I had wiggle room in my getting-ready-for-work time this morning to watch the Wighles. Maybe later…
I am glad you love that rule, Sonnische, because I made it up. Maybe someday I’ll get enough wiggle room to turn that into a book.
Ann, I noticed in the photo of the wiggling chicks and birds, a paper with “Ebola pager” – most interesting, made me think of wiggly strands of Ebola. When I hear wiggle room – I always think of how I dig just a big enough hole to change out pipe on my irrigation system in the garden (when replacing worn out pipe) and sometimes I do not dig the hole big enough to give myself sufficient wiggle room and then I get mad at myself and get in some really weird positions. That’s what I think of when I hear the expression “wiggle room”. Kind of strange – huh? Hope you don’t wiggle too much while at the dentist!!!!!
I had two wiggly reactions to this, SD: I am so glad you wiggled your way over here today and I hope you do not get mad at yourself the next time you are doing your best wiggling around in the room that’s available.
This has my mind wiggling with thoughts of how we need to give ourselves wiggle room–because we’re the only ones who can give ourselves that permission.
This comment makes me wiggle with admiration.
Keep on wiggling, Ann!
I will if you will, Emilie!
Ann, I had never heard this term before being used this way, yet it makes a lot of sense. Sometimes life can be like a rehearsal of wiggles. This is why (how I understand It), it’s best to do as much wiggling as we can while younger. Nevertheless, since some people are slower and introverted (like myself), they miss out on opportunities. When they finally have them, the room for wiggling is no longer there, or it’s already out of place, inappropriate, and just doesn’t match real life situations. I also think it happens to everyone in one way or another. One just has to have patience. For example, an adult having a tantrum. Well, one has to give him/her space and think “this is him/her “wiggling” again, It will pass”; or someone talking too much, or saying something inappropriate. It’s as if we “rehearse” these behaviours again, because we didn’t have the space to “wiggle” them when younger. The problem is this: who will tolerate us as adults with these “wiggles”? If they become deeply ingrained patterns, can we count on the right person/job to understand them? Sometimes I think most everyone has this “wiggle room” they missed, for whichever reason. The phenomena is that in adults it comes out a bit more “untimely”, which is ridiculous, because human growth and development are in a continuum, until we die, so nothing is really “untimely”.
I was so happy to wiggle my way through this insightful comment, Maria, and I especially love the wiggle room in your beautifully expressed last sentence.
So the way to use it then is together with “room”, as in “wiggle room”? It is a phrase then.
“Wiggle room” is a phrase, yes.
I love this post. Never looked at wiggle room this way. I wonder whether there are any synonyms for this kind of wiggle room that might help me look for it.
I had some wiggle room to look up synonyms of “wiggle room,” Maureen, and they include “latitude, leeway, space.”
I like latitude. Thank you, Ann.I feel latitude gratitude.
I like your attitude, Maureen.
Aww hugs to the twenty-something year-old Ann who narrowly escaped raped and felt it didn’t warrant bugging her roomie. ((((((HUGS)))))))) <3
Diana xo
Your awesome hugs are helping me get a lot more wiggle room now, Diana!! <3 <3 xoxo
There’s lots to this wiggle room thing. Trust. Introverted/extroverted perceptions of the world. Even self reliance and a view of self as important or not. This is a layered one for me with lots of things to think about. But I like summing it up in ‘wiggle room.’
Loved the way your thoughts wiggled here and all the room that created!
We’re good, Ann. Lots of wiggle room.
Thanks for the wiggle room you create for others, Mark.
I get more room and less wiggle as I become older
This made me wiggle with laughter, Derrick.
I’m wiggling my finger at you Ann. 💛
There’s always room for you to wiggle here, Val. <3
Just to ensure some wiggle room room here … it should have read fingers not finger 😉 xo
p.s. The Platinum Rule I know (from cross cultural training) is
Do unto others as they would want done unto them.
I like yours too!
I didn’t know there was another Platinum Rule wiggling out there, Val.
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