When I am confused by somebody’s actions or statements, I like to ask “What’s your intent?”
If I don’t ask, I assume what the intent is and I’m probably wrong.
If I knew the owner of this car …
… I would ask “What’s your intent in having that license plate?” Because I don’t know that person, I assume it’s a communication about disaster. What kind of disaster? Maybe living in Maine is a disaster for a lobster.
What’s my intent in taking and sharing these other photos?
My intent is to tell you that you are not alone. We’re all in this together.
Is there something you’re having trouble doing, here and now? Take a moment and ask yourself, “What’s getting in the way?”
Is fear part of the answer?
What’s getting in the way of us getting fear out of the way?
What’s getting in the way of my sharing my photos today? What’s getting in the way is my fear that I have only four new photos and 25% of of them include language that might get in the way.
Nothing is getting in the way of my finding two “Gettin’ in the Way” songs on YouTube (here and here).
What’s getting in the way of your leaving a comment?
Nothing is getting in the way of my expressing my thanks to all who helped me get out of my own way to create today’s blog post and — of course! — to YOU.
I have undying love for the people who made my 65th birthday so wonderful, including
Megan. I love Megan. Yesterday, Megan and I expressed an undying wish that, before we die, we let go of worry, anxiety, overthinking, harsh self-judgments, and fears about the future. I know that love never dies, but I hope that painful and unhelpful thoughts will die (or at least become less strong).
Photos on the internet never die, so here are more photos from yesterday:
My love never dies for chocolate, my boyfriend Michael (who bought me that yummy dessert), my son Aaron, my family, my friends, my work, and my blogging community.
I hope I don’t make this blog worse with today’s topic.
I hear people talking about the fear of making things worse with action AND with inaction.
The fear of making things worse can lead to
hesitation,
paralysis,
second guessing,
sleeplessness,
indecision,
self-judgment,
wheel spinning,
worry,
guilt,
anxiety,
over-thinking,
stress,
shame,
blame, and
all sorts of emotional pain.
Cures for the fear of making things worse include
“Just do it!”
“Just don’t do it!”
“It might get worse but that’s not the end of the story.”
“Most things are NOT irrevocable.”
“Things will get worse then better then worse then better, no matter what you do or don’t do.”
Yesterday, my boyfriend Michael did not make things worse with this story about his twin brother, Steve. When people complain and worry, Steve tells them, “Don’t worry about this! This is nothing! Guaranteed, something MUCH WORSE is coming along.” I heard that as an unusual invitation to enjoy and appreciate the present, and it made me smile.
Let’s see if any of my recent photos make things worse:
Janis Joplin makes things better with “Hesitation Blues.”
If you have any fear of making things worse with a comment, please let that go.
I have no fear of making things worse by expressing gratitude and affection for all who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — for YOU.
I’m nervous but I won’t be afraid of pointing out that this is my second blog post in a row where I’m telling my readers how to be. Yesterday, I quoted the sign “Be Visible” and today I’m quoting this, by graphic designer and artist Sam Lee.
On this last day of 2017, I’m doing my best to be nervous but not afraid of 2018.
Be nervous but don’t be afraid of today’s other photos.
A Zen cat I know (my son Aaron) recently told me: “Don’t be afraid of using more words in your posts, instead of relying so much on your photos.” Every morning, I nervously resolve to write more words here but, somehow, my photos seem to say so much. For example, I am nervous but not afraid of
IDs,
traffic,
running,
being extraordinary,
being chicken,
unlikely friendships, and
cats peeing on things.
For five years, this daily blog has helped me be nervous but not afraid of many challenges of life, including getting a mechanical heart valve
and moving to a new home by the sea.
Be nervous but don’t be afraid of expressing your thoughts and feelings in a comment, if you choose.
As usual, I’m nervous but not afraid of expressing how grateful I am to all those who help me create this blog and — of course! — to YOU.
Last night, when I was at an American supermarket (which was one of the world’s scariest places in the Robin Williams movie “Moscow on the Hudson”), I saw this:
I don’t know what’s included in that magazine of the world’s scariest places. Perhaps it includes places where there’s
genocide,
prejudice,
sexual abuse,
physical abuse and/or
emotional abuse.
What do you think are the world’s scariest places?
Are there any scary places here?
Hospitals can be some of the world’s scariest places, so I’m glad that the hospital where I work has a string quartet playing near the entrance.
There are so many “World’s Scariest Places” videos on YouTube that it’s scaring me, so here’s that scene from “Moscow on the Hudson.”
I hope the comments section here is not a scary place and that you’ll place a comment, below.
Thanks to Robin Williams, the hospital where I work, magazines, supermarkets and every other place, person, and thing that helped me write this world’s-scariest-places post. And thanks to you — of course! — for helping to make this blog one of the safest places I know.
fear and its companion — the fight, flight or freeze response — can save us from danger,
however, the level of fear we experience today is based on the realities of the distant past — the danger-filled lives of our cave-dwelling ancestors who lived under constant threat of invading tribes and wild animals, and
that level of fear interferes with modern life.
Here’s a quote from that article:
“Change has occurred so rapidly for our species that now we are equipped with brains that are super sensitive to threat but also super capable of planning, thinking, forecasting and looking ahead,” said Ahmad Hariri, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University. “So we essentially drive ourselves nuts worrying about things because we have too much time and don’t have many real threats on our survival, so fear gets expressed in these really strange, maladaptive ways.”
I don’t want to drive ourselves nuts by spending too much time on that article here, but I recommend you read the whole thing. And I do want to include a few more quotes from the article before another flight into photography.
Consciously activating the more measured, analytical part of your brain is the key to controlling runaway fear and anxiety.
Arresting an overactive amygdala requires first realizing and then admitting you’re feeling uneasy and scared.
“The more you try to suppress fear, either by ignoring it or doing something else to displace it, the more you will actually experience it.”
The amygdala is less apt to freak out if you are reminded that you are loved or could be loved. For example, seeing images of people with frightened expressions is usually a huge trigger for the amygdala, but that response is greatly diminished when subjects are first shown pictures of people being cared for or hugged.
Just as fear can be contagious, so can courage, caring and calm.
How did those photos affect your modern life?
Before you take flight from this post, I will fight to express my main reason for taking that last photo — it reminded me of the song “Our Time” from Merrily We Roll Along:
To make this our time rather than the time of cave dwellers, let’s do our best to focus on courage, caring, and calm.
Modern thanks to all who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — to YOU.
