Because I’m a psychotherapist, my work includes listening to what people don’t talk about to others in their lives.
What people don’t talk about often causes toxic cycles of judgment, shame, anxiety, depression, and stress.
What people don’t talk about depends on the person and might include
- money,
- sex,
- bodily functions,
- politics,
- perceived weaknesses,
- addictions,
- mistakes,
- family secrets,
- messes,
- failures,
- accomplishments,
- disowned feelings,
- differences,
- abuse,
- racism,
- prejudice,
- ignorance,
- illness,
- religion,
- losses, and
- death.
Do you see what people don’t talk about in my images for today?
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Here’s what I find when I search YouTube for “what people don’t talk about.”
What are your thoughts and feelings about what people don’t talk about?
Thanks to all who helped me create this what-people-don’t-talk-about blog, including YOU!
Happy newspaper columnists day, Ann. Your whole topic today reminds me of a career spent finding ways of getting people comfortable enough to talk about a world’s array of subjects, sometimes neither of us realizing which direction the interview would take until it wiggled its way there.
I really appreciate what you talk about, my friend.
I am having trouble finding something besides the weather than I can talk about with an old friend who has moved to Mexico. His hatred of Biden (he is not a Trumpist) and the US as a whole is very off-putting, and he insists that because I don’t agree with him about the border (he wants to let everyone in right now) (I understand that there are legal impediments to doing all he wants) that I am all for letting people die in miserable camps. So it looks as if I am talking here about things that I don’t like talking about: my inability to get past someone’s firewall. And why I continue to try. And maybe the reasons I keep getting it wrong.
The way you talk shows how much you care, Barbara.
I think that people don’t talk about what they feel guilty or ashamed of, or that they think others will judge them about.
I agree with what you’re taking about here, beth.
A friend of mine texted me to say he was at his church practicing the organ and he added, “No dirty jokes, please.” The last time he told me he was doing that I said “The only thing better than roses on your piano is tulips on your organ.”
I didn’t send any dirty jokes this time but it occurred to me that he didn’t have to tell me what he was doing. Now I’m worried I disappointed him.
Something I don’t talk about is that I live with an almost constant feeling of concern I’m disappointing others and that my friends are too nice to say anything. Admitting it like this really is helpful, though; it helps me see how ridiculous it is.
Aww, Christopher, that is funny and sweet. The world needs more like you.
You never disappoint, Chris.
Sometimes words no longer articulate feeling nor expression. Non verbal communication becomes a language of its own, seeking outlets of expression somewhere, somehow. I think Art has helped me find a voice when words no longer do. I need to rest my vocal chords and slip into a cocoon-like state. I need a break from being human for once.
Thanks for all the ways you communicate, Maria.
The Not Okay one bears repetition
Thanks for talking about that, Derrick.
I really appreciate that you are so open and encourage to your clients, as well as your readers! 🙂
I really enjoyed reading all the responses here, Ann. You covered most subjects I would have mentioned in response to what we don’t talk about: overactive bladders or bowels, anorexia, dyslexic grandkids… etc. But, the response that really spoke to me was, “I don’t like talking about: my inability to get past someone’s firewall. And why I continue to try. And maybe the reasons I keep getting it wrong.” That’s a biggy for me.
Thanks for talking about that, Jan.